Get Ahead of the Summer Break
Spring break just passed, and if you're like most parents, you probably felt a mix of relief (no early morning rush!), stress (what are we going to do all day?), and by the end of the week… total readiness for school to start again.
So, how can we get ahead of that feeling before summer arrives? What can we do now to prepare for a smoother, more enjoyable break for everyone?
The Balance Between Structure and Freedom
Camps are a great way to fill the time, but did you know that brain science tells us boredom is essential for children? It’s in moments of unstructured play that kids develop executive functioning skills—planning, problem-solving, and carrying out tasks.
Children also need a break from constantly following rules. If your child pushes boundaries frequently, they may be experiencing structure fatigue—too much external control, not enough autonomy.
So how do we create structure that actually supports relaxation? How do we build an environment where kids feel safe to explore and can entertain themselves for hours?
Let’s talk strategies.
Are You Standing in the Way of Independent Play?
"My child won’t play alone! They're always looking for me to entertain them."
This is a great opportunity for boundary-setting.
Playing with your kids is wonderful and essential for bonding. But here’s the thing—children tend to live in a constant state of "play mode," while adults do not. This can create conflict: you play until you feel drained, then they feel rejected.
For some kids, too much parent-led play actually hinders their ability to play independently. If you're dreading summer because you’re stretched too thin, it might be time to set clear, kind boundaries around when you’re available for play and when you’re not. Simply being clear and loving is key. You can say when you’ll be available again, but you don’t have to! In fact, doing so can keep your child ‘on the hook’ waiting for an abstract, unclear period of time to pass.
Sample Scripts:
“That was so fun! I am all done playing, what will you do next?”
2. Fostering Independence
Just like with play, kids need practice solving problems on their own. They need to experience hunger, boredom, and thirst in a low stakes environment where they have the tools to meet their needs. They need you to provide the tools in the environment to meet the need.
Toileting is a classic example of something you truly cannot do for them, you provide the support (underwear, small potty, reminders) they have to do the work of using the bathroom themselves.
Similar principle with eating and drinking, you provide the sustenance, utensils, cup, and running water in an accessible location, and guidance. With these tools they learn to feel in their body when they need these things.
Observe your child’s natural patterns—do they have a "tell" when they’re getting restless, hungry, or tired? These little cues can help you anticipate their needs while still allowing them space to navigate challenges. When we notice the cues we can give some gentle guidance, towards a dark room if they need to nap, or toward the kitchen if they need a snack. With older children you can help them grow from needing to be served at lunch time (as they may have needed when they were a baby or toddler) to serving themselves from what's provided.
This is a great time to start teaching 4-6 year olds how to make a meal! What are the things our family expects on a plate for meal time? Having these conversations leading up to summer break lays a foundation for knowing how to take care of oneself.
Sample Scripts:
“I see you rubbing your eyes, would you like to lie down for a bit?” or
“I see you getting really frustrated with that puzzle, and it’s almost lunchtime. Does your tummy feel empty?”
“You’re getting sweaty! Do you think it's time to take a drink?”
“For lunch we need to choose a fruit, vegetable, and a protein. Here’s what we have, which ones will you choose?”
3. Bring Them Into Your World
Yes, chores take longer with a young child. But guess what? They want to be with you anyway.
So instead of resisting it, involve them! Show them how your family organizes, cleans, and prepares meals. These are the real-life skills they need, and summer is the perfect time to model them.
Of course, independent play is just as valuable—so don’t feel guilty about letting them explore solo while you tackle tasks. Dusting and scrubbing can be a lot of fun with the right framing.
Sample Script:
“I could use a helper vacuuming today! Would you like to join or play with your legos instead?”
4. Set Up an Environment That Supports Play
Ask yourself:
When my child has an idea, can they easily access what they need?
Do they bring me materials and ask me to do it for them?
Are they relying on me to set up their play?
If they constantly seek your help, it might be time to make materials more accessible—art supplies, building blocks, and dress-up clothes within reach can empower them to take the lead in their play.
Additionally, setting up the space for easier cleanup can be encouraging, especially for children that get overwhelmed by mess. A tray for carrying materials, a trashcan next to their workspace, a bowl or basket for scraps nearby are all great tools for cleanup.
Want help preparing for a more enjoyable summer?
By starting these processes now, you can experiment with what works best for your child and family. By summer, you’ll have more information about spaces that need to be cleared and expectations to be set.
Reach out to me as challenges arise so I can help you work out kinks! I can also help get your home organized and summer ready to make clean up a breeze. Fill out a contact form to get in touch!